A BREAKDOWN OF the Boots 2014 Christmas Catalogue. I shall translate:
Limited Edition – Instead of making more of these mass produced items, we made less of these. (there was a problem at the factory)
New Improved Recipe! – ‘Improved’ still does not neecessarily mean ‘good’.
‘Energising’ body wash, or similar derivatives – Promises a change of energy levels, but its only power is that it leaves you poorer but smelling of mint.
3 for 2 – You pay for the cheapest item spread across the other two items.
Great deals! – We have ensured that we make at least a 400% profit on all items.
Winter essentials! – Things you may, or may not want, but are unlikely to be featured on an updated Maslow hierarchy of needs, unless your body requires cocoa butter to function.
Gifts for Him – Tubes of various contents destined to go out of date, unused…